因为你让我明白到想要生存下来要懂些什么...
我有你这样的"好爸爸"是否要谢谢上天吗???
最近,我明白原来我是不应该存在这个家...
发生了那么多事我真的明白了...
我真的真的明白很多事...
生存在这个家让我觉得很有压力...
让我很不安乐...
我不应该那么的信任你们...
我明白了家人的第二个意识...
青春，回忆。
9 years ago
MISS
Miss a person but cant go find the people is really hard...
For me didn't meet or see dao you a few second will super miss,worry and nervous...
Why will like this just cause one reason...
I think you know too,cause I have say to you before...
At first I know that miss a person really very suffer when cant meet the person...
You have so miss me or not...
I really not sure...
But I hope that you have...
Miss a person really hard to desribe...
Even how miss just could bear the miss...
Need to bear the miss until how long only could meet you I really don't know...
Sometimes I really want speak loud to you that I really cant bear anymore...
I REALLY VERY MISS YOU VERY MUCH...
But I not dare to tell you cause really have no idea to solve I don't miss you...
Sometimes I also will ask myself why I so miss you...
Finally I know that I miss you is cause I LOVE YOU...
Haiz~
Say so much I also cant bear to miss you...
Haiz~
Just want say that
I MISS YOU VERY MUCH!!!!!!
Miss a person but cant go find the people is really hard...
For me didn't meet or see dao you a few second will super miss,worry and nervous...
Why will like this just cause one reason...
I think you know too,cause I have say to you before...
At first I know that miss a person really very suffer when cant meet the person...
You have so miss me or not...
I really not sure...
But I hope that you have...
Miss a person really hard to desribe...
Even how miss just could bear the miss...
Need to bear the miss until how long only could meet you I really don't know...
Sometimes I really want speak loud to you that I really cant bear anymore...
I REALLY VERY MISS YOU VERY MUCH...
But I not dare to tell you cause really have no idea to solve I don't miss you...
Sometimes I also will ask myself why I so miss you...
Finally I know that I miss you is cause I LOVE YOU...
Haiz~
Say so much I also cant bear to miss you...
Haiz~
Just want say that
I MISS YOU VERY MUCH!!!!!!
Heart Pain
Haiz~
One day sudden happen much things...
I cant bear it at all...
Undang exam fail...
Seem very useless cause study for much day still get those result...Hate myself...
After go midvalley alone,train delate for 1 hours...Haiz~
Super bad lucky...
Reach there really have no mood for shopping and watch movie...
Sudden when back time was happen something...
The thing let me feel sum tong,suffer,sad,cry...
I don't know want how...
Inside the train I bear to don't drop eye tail,I keep bear,keep bear,keep bear...
The eye tail was going drop on but keep cool down myself,to let myself relax...
But when think must wait until two week,until we start study only could meet and contiunes the relationship,my heart feel pain and suffer...
Two week for me was too long even two second didn't meet you...
Sudden happen those thing have many plan have to stop...
26th have to cancel,27th was the important have to cancel...
Even the 100th days too...
Haiz~After reach kajang ktm I quick walk of the ktm...
Cause I really cant bear the eye tail is droping...
While the eye tail droping,the heart also blooding...
It was very pain and suffer,how come you call me to wait for the two week until school reopen...
For me two second already was problem...
I really don't know I could bear or not...
The eye tail keep drop I feel very imcompent,I want stop at half way to contiunes cry...
But sudden going to knock by car...
But why that car don't straight knock maybe I wouldn't feel pain and suffer anymore...
I cant bear to cry and heart blooding...
But I wait until very long my daddy havent come,I havent stop cry until the nose blooding too...
Why the health also need to bring trouble for me...
I not dare told my daddy what was happen...
I just could find lisa...
Anyway thank you help and told me everything...
I think my emotions still need to control...
Much unhappy thing was happen on today...
Heart pain,suffer,blooding and so still remain...
Keep cry until non-stop...
I still could bear until so long...?
Haiz~
One day sudden happen much things...
I cant bear it at all...
Undang exam fail...
Seem very useless cause study for much day still get those result...Hate myself...
After go midvalley alone,train delate for 1 hours...Haiz~
Super bad lucky...
Reach there really have no mood for shopping and watch movie...
Sudden when back time was happen something...
The thing let me feel sum tong,suffer,sad,cry...
I don't know want how...
Inside the train I bear to don't drop eye tail,I keep bear,keep bear,keep bear...
The eye tail was going drop on but keep cool down myself,to let myself relax...
But when think must wait until two week,until we start study only could meet and contiunes the relationship,my heart feel pain and suffer...
Two week for me was too long even two second didn't meet you...
Sudden happen those thing have many plan have to stop...
26th have to cancel,27th was the important have to cancel...
Even the 100th days too...
Haiz~After reach kajang ktm I quick walk of the ktm...
Cause I really cant bear the eye tail is droping...
While the eye tail droping,the heart also blooding...
It was very pain and suffer,how come you call me to wait for the two week until school reopen...
For me two second already was problem...
I really don't know I could bear or not...
The eye tail keep drop I feel very imcompent,I want stop at half way to contiunes cry...
But sudden going to knock by car...
But why that car don't straight knock maybe I wouldn't feel pain and suffer anymore...
I cant bear to cry and heart blooding...
But I wait until very long my daddy havent come,I havent stop cry until the nose blooding too...
Why the health also need to bring trouble for me...
I not dare told my daddy what was happen...
I just could find lisa...
Anyway thank you help and told me everything...
I think my emotions still need to control...
Much unhappy thing was happen on today...
Heart pain,suffer,blooding and so still remain...
Keep cry until non-stop...
I still could bear until so long...?
SPM~
Finally going finish our SPM......
Still have one day of chiness exam,we form 5 could free already.......
Actually can't say free already is start our new war again......
This war have relationship with our future......
After SPM we still have many thing wait-ING us to do.....
After the last day exam don't know when we only could meet again......
We have our own thing need to do after that......
Much of us is prepare-ING for intake early......
Some of us is prepare-ING for work first........
Actually how was me I still don't know,have no idea at all.......
What course should I going to take.........
I never never never know it.......
Just have follow what had my daddy choose........
Many choice for me but never have one I love most..........
I was tired for exam already now giving me many choice of course that I should take one........
Really very very very tired......
Could let me rest and relax first.....????
Haiz~SPM already bring problem for me,now take course also bring problem.......
What courseould take....???
Bio-tec,business and finase,account and finase,doctor...????
Don't know......
Haiz,I think wait finish SPM only think again bah.......
Very headache and tired~
Finally going finish our SPM......
Still have one day of chiness exam,we form 5 could free already.......
Actually can't say free already is start our new war again......
This war have relationship with our future......
After SPM we still have many thing wait-ING us to do.....
After the last day exam don't know when we only could meet again......
We have our own thing need to do after that......
Much of us is prepare-ING for intake early......
Some of us is prepare-ING for work first........
Actually how was me I still don't know,have no idea at all.......
What course should I going to take.........
I never never never know it.......
Just have follow what had my daddy choose........
Many choice for me but never have one I love most..........
I was tired for exam already now giving me many choice of course that I should take one........
Really very very very tired......
Could let me rest and relax first.....????
Haiz~SPM already bring problem for me,now take course also bring problem.......
What courseould take....???
Bio-tec,business and finase,account and finase,doctor...????
Don't know......
Haiz,I think wait finish SPM only think again bah.......
Very headache and tired~
10/10/2009
Cause yesterday have not mood today also same.........
HATE it~
Today already have not mood at all.......
When meet YOU some more mood down.........
YOU was very grumpy and in bad mood........
YOU was first time so grumpy to me.......
I was very shock-ING........
What was HAPPENED.....????
YOU was very scary at that time.........
I don't know want how and what should i do.......
Haiz~
Afternoon~
I was rush of time cause have many thing want to do.......
Wanted make YOU happy so think alot ideal.........
And think-ING make surpise for YOU.........
At least on 8 o'clock i done all thing........
Finally finish my surpise present........
Then wait-ING daddy back go for having dinner........
Then daddy want accompany friend and I was wait-ING my friend okay for they show.......
They have show on today........
They was very smart on dance and sing-ING.......
Finally they finish and i want to give something to people........
So told them i want walk to that people house........
But stop by them,and get they blame..........
But at least my daddy help me i done my work.........
Ermm........
Just say until this part other can told your all........
So hope YOU don't so grumpy again and in bad mood.........
So end here~
Cause yesterday have not mood today also same.........
HATE it~
Today already have not mood at all.......
When meet YOU some more mood down.........
YOU was very grumpy and in bad mood........
YOU was first time so grumpy to me.......
I was very shock-ING........
What was HAPPENED.....????
YOU was very scary at that time.........
I don't know want how and what should i do.......
Haiz~
Afternoon~
I was rush of time cause have many thing want to do.......
Wanted make YOU happy so think alot ideal.........
And think-ING make surpise for YOU.........
At least on 8 o'clock i done all thing........
Finally finish my surpise present........
Then wait-ING daddy back go for having dinner........
Then daddy want accompany friend and I was wait-ING my friend okay for they show.......
They have show on today........
They was very smart on dance and sing-ING.......
Finally they finish and i want to give something to people........
So told them i want walk to that people house........
But stop by them,and get they blame..........
But at least my daddy help me i done my work.........
Ermm........
Just say until this part other can told your all........
So hope YOU don't so grumpy again and in bad mood.........
So end here~
9/10/2009
Today very early then wake up already........
Or else could say never sleep last night.......
Cause have no mood sleep at all......
Don't why isn't YOU unhappy so me also like this.......
But yesterday already promise teach nyin make cake......
So must attend then went for buy those all thing........
Then reach nyin's house but still need wait-ING her parent back.........
Then we could go to her aunt's house mke cake........
Then we start make cheese cake.......
It very easy to make and hold process was make by nyin herself and also her sister,nzii.......
Seem like very easy to make those cake but when the cake bake okay.........
Was very worse,not same as what i did last time.........
Seem very weird of the cake.........
Isn't the procedure wrong already...????
Where know nyin aunt's house the oven too small cant bake then we go another aunt's house......
At least we could calm down and make the second cake.........
Its was a sponge cake........
But don't know why its cant sucess at all.......
Isn't materials was wrong or procedure wrong....????
I HATE this feel.........
I LOVE make cake but when mak-ING cake time it can't sucess at all........
Haiz~
Finally have xinlu the help that cake sucess........
But i was not happy at all,cause teach people make cake can't sucess.......
But when make by myself will sucess and can eat.........
Then we wait-ING the cake bake okay and we also have make muffin......
Finally okay bak-ING,the cake and muffin very fragrant and nice to eat......
Then we decide take for lisa they and also give some to our biology tuition teacher......
After that call my cousin come fetch me back to shower and fetch xinlu to tuition........
8 o'clock start tuition until 10 o'clock.......
Back home those all cake was ate by my family......
Haiz~
I have not try the cake......
Today was happy cause make cake but also tired and the mood was not well at all......
First time make cake until like this.........
HATE those feeling........
No mood want write at all and have nothing want to share........
So end writting.......
Today very early then wake up already........
Or else could say never sleep last night.......
Cause have no mood sleep at all......
Don't why isn't YOU unhappy so me also like this.......
But yesterday already promise teach nyin make cake......
So must attend then went for buy those all thing........
Then reach nyin's house but still need wait-ING her parent back.........
Then we could go to her aunt's house mke cake........
Then we start make cheese cake.......
It very easy to make and hold process was make by nyin herself and also her sister,nzii.......
Seem like very easy to make those cake but when the cake bake okay.........
Was very worse,not same as what i did last time.........
Seem very weird of the cake.........
Isn't the procedure wrong already...????
Where know nyin aunt's house the oven too small cant bake then we go another aunt's house......
At least we could calm down and make the second cake.........
Its was a sponge cake........
But don't know why its cant sucess at all.......
Isn't materials was wrong or procedure wrong....????
I HATE this feel.........
I LOVE make cake but when mak-ING cake time it can't sucess at all........
Haiz~
Finally have xinlu the help that cake sucess........
But i was not happy at all,cause teach people make cake can't sucess.......
But when make by myself will sucess and can eat.........
Then we wait-ING the cake bake okay and we also have make muffin......
Finally okay bak-ING,the cake and muffin very fragrant and nice to eat......
Then we decide take for lisa they and also give some to our biology tuition teacher......
After that call my cousin come fetch me back to shower and fetch xinlu to tuition........
8 o'clock start tuition until 10 o'clock.......
Back home those all cake was ate by my family......
Haiz~
I have not try the cake......
Today was happy cause make cake but also tired and the mood was not well at all......
First time make cake until like this.........
HATE those feeling........
No mood want write at all and have nothing want to share........
So end writting.......
6/10/2009
Today was my birthday~
Hehe~
I was so happy~
Yesterday night have not sleep at all........
Cause my gor suddenly call me,and accompany me hold night......
Beside that,YOU also accompany me hold night......
After chat-ING with YOU then my gor was call come.........
Then hold night was no sleep chat-ING with gor.......
Then next morning need go out early cause my gang was decide go for sing k.........
Hehe~
Hold night already have many people wish me HAPPY BIRTHDAY.........
So happy~cant sleep already~
Morning time~
Rush of time was didn't having breakfast then straight go to bus stop find 002 and 003......
Where know they was late than me.......
I thought i was the late ones.........
Hehe~
While wait-ING them already have 2 bus pass by........
So i decide when they come MUST blame them already........
Finally they reach,then 002 say cause of he suddenly change a PRO phone so didn't wish me last night.......
Its okay~don't worry~
After that we was reach balakong and need to change bus.......
That bus was very slow make me start feel not well.........
Finally we reach jusco cheras selatan then go for meet 004.........
Then we go to green box meet 001.......
While wait-ING for sing k time,we go for buy-ING ticket for later watch-ING movie.........
We decide watch "Where Got Ghost"........
Then we start for sing-ING song.........
From the first song until the last song also is me and 004 sing the most......
Other also don't know stay do-ING what........
Keep walk in out the room or else go for toliet or take drink-ING.......
Then when i and 004 sing-ING that "Way Back Into Love" time,the tv screen suddenly appears "HAPPY BIRTHDAY".......
I was shock-ING at there,don't know want give what respone........
Then the door suddenly open and the waiter was take-ING the birthday cake in........
Then behind the waiter was is a SCERET PRESENT---------> LISA......
I some more feel shock-ING cause doesn't have people told me..........
Then run to lisa there hug her.......
Haha~
Really very happy they give me this susprise.......
Then sing "BIRTHDAY SONG" and make wish then cut cake and eat.......
Finish that we contiunes sing-ING until finish......
MOST happy is the last song was my idol JAY CHOW's song......
Haha~
Then we go shopping and look so many nice the shirt.........
But i also must get permission from my dear designer.......
Finally reach the time start watch our movie........
Then go buy popcorn and drink.........
Then go in that cinema but just have those few line have people......
Seem so SCARY and COLD!!!!!!!!!!!
Then the hold process i keep eat-ING my popcorn and feel very cold.......
Then we keep laugh until so loud when reach the funny part........
Then the 004 was so scare when watch-ING the movie.........
She keep take her jacket and cover her eye when sit beside me.......
Then when finish that show,004 say want fast get of the cinema room.........
Cause she scare and we feel very cold..........
Then me and lisa decide want back cause have somebody promise me bring me to pasar malam at sungai long........
Then 002,003 and 004 say want buy something so left at there.........
The bus awhile then reach kajang........
So walk to mcD find that people.......
But that people say didn't go........
Haiz~
Make me feel disappointed,i already wait for long time.........
Suddenlly feel that all happy mood gone........
Then back to daddy shop went home to attend another party........
Seem like 12 o'clock then back cause have no mood happy and contiunes play-ING........
Nothing could share so end conversation.........
Just wanted thank those all wish me the friend.........
Thank your all the wish,present and susprise........
LOVE your all~Muackz~
Today was my birthday~
Hehe~
I was so happy~
Yesterday night have not sleep at all........
Cause my gor suddenly call me,and accompany me hold night......
Beside that,YOU also accompany me hold night......
After chat-ING with YOU then my gor was call come.........
Then hold night was no sleep chat-ING with gor.......
Then next morning need go out early cause my gang was decide go for sing k.........
Hehe~
Hold night already have many people wish me HAPPY BIRTHDAY.........
So happy~cant sleep already~
Morning time~
Rush of time was didn't having breakfast then straight go to bus stop find 002 and 003......
Where know they was late than me.......
I thought i was the late ones.........
Hehe~
While wait-ING them already have 2 bus pass by........
So i decide when they come MUST blame them already........
Finally they reach,then 002 say cause of he suddenly change a PRO phone so didn't wish me last night.......
Its okay~don't worry~
After that we was reach balakong and need to change bus.......
That bus was very slow make me start feel not well.........
Finally we reach jusco cheras selatan then go for meet 004.........
Then we go to green box meet 001.......
While wait-ING for sing k time,we go for buy-ING ticket for later watch-ING movie.........
We decide watch "Where Got Ghost"........
Then we start for sing-ING song.........
From the first song until the last song also is me and 004 sing the most......
Other also don't know stay do-ING what........
Keep walk in out the room or else go for toliet or take drink-ING.......
Then when i and 004 sing-ING that "Way Back Into Love" time,the tv screen suddenly appears "HAPPY BIRTHDAY".......
I was shock-ING at there,don't know want give what respone........
Then the door suddenly open and the waiter was take-ING the birthday cake in........
Then behind the waiter was is a SCERET PRESENT---------> LISA......
I some more feel shock-ING cause doesn't have people told me..........
Then run to lisa there hug her.......
Haha~
Really very happy they give me this susprise.......
Then sing "BIRTHDAY SONG" and make wish then cut cake and eat.......
Finish that we contiunes sing-ING until finish......
MOST happy is the last song was my idol JAY CHOW's song......
Haha~
Then we go shopping and look so many nice the shirt.........
But i also must get permission from my dear designer.......
Finally reach the time start watch our movie........
Then go buy popcorn and drink.........
Then go in that cinema but just have those few line have people......
Seem so SCARY and COLD!!!!!!!!!!!
Then the hold process i keep eat-ING my popcorn and feel very cold.......
Then we keep laugh until so loud when reach the funny part........
Then the 004 was so scare when watch-ING the movie.........
She keep take her jacket and cover her eye when sit beside me.......
Then when finish that show,004 say want fast get of the cinema room.........
Cause she scare and we feel very cold..........
Then me and lisa decide want back cause have somebody promise me bring me to pasar malam at sungai long........
Then 002,003 and 004 say want buy something so left at there.........
The bus awhile then reach kajang........
So walk to mcD find that people.......
But that people say didn't go........
Haiz~
Make me feel disappointed,i already wait for long time.........
Suddenlly feel that all happy mood gone........
Then back to daddy shop went home to attend another party........
Seem like 12 o'clock then back cause have no mood happy and contiunes play-ING........
Nothing could share so end conversation.........
Just wanted thank those all wish me the friend.........
Thank your all the wish,present and susprise........
LOVE your all~Muackz~
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